Monday, November 15, 2010

swan song

When my second child was born almost four years ago, I was ready for a change. I had been plugging away as a part-time worship leader in my church, but had grown tired and ready to be a stay-at-home mom for a while. I had always had a dream of owning my own redesign business. It was something I was good at and had been helping friends redecorate for years just for fun. I started thinking, "Wouldn't it be fun to give it a shot?" I was blessed with a husband who had a steady job and we had always been committed to living on just his income, so there wasn't a lot of pressure to make lots of money right away. In addition, I had just given birth to my second daughter, and while she is a huge blessing now and brings so much joy to our family - she was not an easy baby! She refused to sleep at night and I was exhausted...I wanted somethiing "fun" to focus on. Thus, Nesting Instincts was born! I began working on a simple website, and when I started blogging in January of 2008, the business just took off! For a year, the business was just above and beyond what I could have hoped it would be. I was having so much fun. I remember saying to my husband, "I don't know how long this will last, but for now, it's just such a gift from God. He didn't have to bless this business, but He knew it was something I really wanted right now and he's brought clients and just really smiled on the whole thing this year."

And it's so true. I haven't talked about my faith a whole lot on this blog, because it's always been about promoting my business, but the fact is, I am who I am because of God. And my faith in Him colors everything about my life. I would be a mess without Him. So when my business started to receive accolades from even the most unexpected quarters, I thanked God, because I knew that "every good and perfect gift comes from the Father above" as the Bible says. While all of this was happening, I started attending a new church closer to my home and, while I no longer had to lead worship on Sundays, God wouldn't let me forget about worship leading. People who hadn't even heard me play or sing kept asking me to join worship teams or to lead worship at women's Bible study or various events. And then, almost 20 months ago, I gave birth to my sweet boy. He has been a huge blessing to our family and we're so grateful for him! However, he's also been an unexpected challenge. He's developmentally delayed, and we've spent the last eleven months in therapy, evaluations, testing, etc. to try and determine what the issues are and what the cause might be. We still don't have a whole lot more answers now than we did a year ago (except we know a whole lot of diseases that he doesn't have now).

And so, in spite of some big challenges and other time commitments, I have continued to plug away at my little Nesting Instincts. Decorating, shopping, bargain-hunting, graphic design, entertaining and throwing parties...I've always loved those things! And I always will! But recently, God's given me a new direction in life. He's shown me that he wants me to focus more on ministry to Him and to others and that the season of Nesting Instincts, the business, is coming to a close. Honestly, if you had told me a year ago that I would be writing this, I would have predicted that I would be feeling very sad and nostalgic right now...that there might be great "weeping and gnashing of teeth" as I close this chapter of my life. Actually, there is some nostalgia, but I am not mourning the end of this season! Mostly because I'm so excited about whatever it is that God has in store for me next. (And in case you ask, I have no idea what that might be.) I just feel like this is the right thing to do. God has shifted my priorities, and I want to be a part of what he's doing in the world. Many would say that I could have still ministered through decorating, etc. And that is true! And there is absolutely nothing wrong with decorating...I will always love it! But I've had a personal encounter with my God and I want to be available for the "something new" that he's going to do next. The when, what, how....I don't know that stuff yet. But I do know the "Who"...that's God...and because of Him, my life will never be the same.

I will always be available to help (and will enjoy helping) my friends and family decorate or plan parties or whatever. But I am going to put my business to bed for now and continue to seek God's will for my daily life and for my future. I have plenty to keep me busy...leading worship, parenting three little ones (one with special needs) and trying to be a blessing to others.

So, my friends...THANK YOU!!!!!!  So many of you have had me into your homes, asked my advice, read my blog, left lovely comments, purchased my cards, inspired me, supported me, encouraged me, blessed me. THANK YOU hardly seems like enough, but there is so much gratitude in my heart for each one of you that has played a special part in my life and in Nesting Instincts over the last three years! I love each one of you and pray that God will reveal Himself to you and bless you in a special way this year.

Hugs, hugs, HUGS!!!
:-) Courtney


EDITED TO ADD: 
PS I will leave NestInk, my Etsy shop, open until Thanksgiving, for anyone that wants to order Christmas presents!

11 comments:

  1. I am so excited for you because you are on an awesome journey. I have been trying to figure out my path for quite awhile now, but I think I need to listen more to what He is telling me. I have enjoyed getting to know you and I pray nothing but God's Best for you.

    xo
    LeAnn

    ReplyDelete
  2. SO many wonderful things are in store for you Courtney! I am so excited to see where God is going to take you next! It is so inspiring to see people redirect for the Lord. I'm sad I won't be able to stalk you on here anytime I want, but cannot wait for the next step. Love love love you! :)Brynn

    ReplyDelete
  3. YOU may not be mourning the loss, but I am! :-) No, I am so excited for you and happy that you have such a close, deep relationship with the Lord that you know when He is leading you on. I have always been in sheer and utter awe of your talents and will miss seeing your creations. But God is good and He knows what He's doing. He knows that plans He has for you. What a journey. I applaud your faithfulness and candor!
    Love you,
    Char

    ReplyDelete
  4. Courtney you will be a blessing no matter what God has you do...you have blessed me hugely in so so many ways, not just decorating, but in the peace and calm air you have about you...many of God's favors over you girlfriend:) Debbie Seward

    ReplyDelete
  5. Courtney,

    I have SO loved having your help in my home and was looking forward to more in the future yet I am very excited for wherever the Lord may lead you. You have a beautiful heart and are gifted in many ways. I have already read your new blog and teared up in some places. I could feel your passion and your heart for God. I look forward to reading along as you are lead to write more.

    Blessings and love,
    Hannah

    ReplyDelete
  6. Sweetness, it sounds a good choice you're making!
    I'm sure God will keep using you to bless others and that he will keep giving you exciting challenges!
    All the best!
    Andrea
    xx

    ReplyDelete
  7. Dearest Courtney-
    I didn't see this coming, but totally understand and admire the choice you have made. God has used you in so many ways and has big plans for you as you seek to follow Him. Thanks for sharing your gifts with all of us. I will miss your blog, but look forward to following your new one. I hope I fall into the category of friends and family that can still call on your expertise. : )
    Love you!!
    Lauree

    ReplyDelete
  8. I'm so surprised and sad to hear this. I'll miss you and Nesting Instincts, Courtney! Sounds like it's truly time to move on to new adventures, though. I hope you'll keep in touch now and then and let us know how your son is doing, too. Sending you hugs and best wishes for this new chapter in your life!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I know I've been a lazy (re: absent ;-) blogger these past several months, but I have to say I'll miss you greatly. You were one of the first blogs I stumbled across, and have always been a favorite. You are a talented designer and truly a gifted writer, and I hope down the road you will find an outlet to share your amazing talents with us again. And we'll always share those lamps, lol! Best wishes with everything, Courtney. With much love and gratitude, Laura xo

    ReplyDelete
  10. (Sorry, I've been off air for a few months...) I wish you the best with your journey and your son. I just wanted to let you I went through something very similar with my youngest son and know how frustating it can be. We started noticing delays around 13 months and they suddenly started getting worse. He went through so many diagnosis (you really to rejoice when you get a negative & can cross one off the list) and was finally placed on the spectrum as PDD-NOS, which is basically like a big question mark. I kept pushing and finally found a doctor that discovered he had leaky gut and severe food allergies. Since changing his diet he started speaking, making eye contact and slowly catching up to his peers. I still have so many unanswered questions, but I have learned to trust my gut and not give up. Having my son has been a gift, and a constant reminder to slow down and enjoy each moment. You are so blessed to have such a wonderful path ahead of you. I wish you the best and I have really enjoyed your blog, keep us posted.
    XO
    Danika

    ReplyDelete
  11. HI, Courtney, thanks so much for your sweet words. I can tell you have been on a journey yourself, what a sweetly written post this is. We all go through life challenges don't we? I could not get through it all without God in my life and I see you feel the same way. I love that! You just keep doing what you feel God wants you to do and things will be just fine. I'm grateful for the doors I see Him opening for me at this time in my life & I want to be obedient in all areas. xoxo!

    ReplyDelete

thank you for commenting, dahling! I can't wait to hear what you have to say. :-)